Locker Room Etiquette

Three days... must be a new record...

So I haven't been living up to my own expectations. I had hoping to make this blog a thrilling read about exciting science. No -- this is not an oxymoron. I had set out to INFORM the WORLD, about the evils of global climate change and the awesomeness of recent discoveries. And yet here I am ranting about locker room etiquette. But you know? There are plenty of blogs discussing global climate change and recent discoveries (see my recommended blogs over there --------->), so I guess someone has to rant about etiquette.

Okay first -- Old Dude, who is in the locker room what seems like every morning I am, it is not okay to dress in the order you do. Once you leave the shower, it is a locker room requirement that you apply pants to your body ASAP. For no reason, should the order be, leave the shower, take off towel, stand "proud" for the world to see, apply deodorant, put on shirt, put on socks, THEN put on underpants. It's creepy. Weird. And did I mention creepy? Maybe he should check out a site like this. (what I found when I Googled "instructions on how to dress yourself")

On a side note: how awesome is that you can use Google as a verb?

Second. Asian guy I saw two days in a row. It is not okay to self-induce engorgement of your own genitalia in a public. I know this may be confusing because normally a shower is a private thing and nothing is better than "relieving stress" with a hot stream of water running down your back. BUT this is not a private shower. In fact there are three other guys in the shower with you, wondering what the frack you are doing. No. No. STOP. We are not looking at you because we want you to continue. This is our way of letting you know that we can in fact see you and that is so not kosher! What, don't speed up. No! STOP! NO!!!! (no Danger, this is not my yelling because ejaculate is being sprayed everywhere)

That's it. I am sure I will update this list too as I spend more time in the locker room. Why are people so weird?